Talking with School-Aged Children about Abuse

Talking with School-Aged Children About Abuse

By: the Dakota Children’s Advocacy Center

Caregivers may withhold conversations about physical or sexual abuse from younger children because they are uncomfortable talking about what they believe is a mature topic. The reality is that children in grade school are particularly vulnerable because of their innocence and emotional needs, making them easy targets for predators. These individuals are often experts at spotting kids who may lack confidence or have fewer supportive adults around them. Predators exploit these vulnerabilities to manipulate children.

Experts suggest that by the time kids are around 7 to 10 years old, it’s important to start talking to them about puberty and sexual intercourse. It’s helpful to begin these conversations earlier rather than later since kids are likely to hear about these topics from less reliable sources like friends, siblings, or social media.

It’s also crucial to explain how our bodies naturally respond to stimulation. Predators know how to use this biological response against children. Just like how you might laugh when tickled even if you don’t want to, sexual arousal is something we can’t control. Predators can make kids feel guilty or ashamed about this, so it’s essential to talk openly about it.

Talking with children at every age about body safety (good vs. bad touch), identifying multiple safe adults that they can talk to, and preparing children for unsafe situations by talking through scenarios, are all ways we can help keep children safe.

Learn how to talk to children about abuse at every age by visiting the Rock the Talk® page on the Mama Bear Effect website or www.dakotacac.org.